Reality check: The ‘What’s Working, What’s Not List’

Self-reflection for the win! Photo by Vera Bitterer

Get real with yourself with this tool. Works for me every time.

I am not always on my best behavior. I try. I want all the good habits. I want to do my best and feel my best, and I want that for you all too. That’s why I make up these silly chore games and challenge jars and sorting hats and all of that.
 
But sometimes I go off the rails and recognize that I need to get myself back on track.

For years, long before RYC existed, I’ve gone to what I call the “What’s Working, What’s Not List.” It’s a self-exam where I poke and prod my daily habits to access what’s going on—so I can figure out what to do about it.
 
How it works
On a piece of paper, make two columns. On the left put “What’s working,” on the right, “What’s not.”
 
On the left, I list positive things I am doing, even if I am not doing them perfectly or consistently. They’re the habits I know work in my life—the behaviors that move me forward in good ways.
 
On the right, I get real about where I am going wrong—what behaviors, big and small, are getting in the way of me being at my best and feeling good about my life and myself?
 
​Here’s an example of what my list might look like. It isn’t exactly accurate for this moment in time. These lists are best if they’re really personal and vulnerable. I share my life online to hopefully inspire and be relatable, but y’all don’t need to know every little thing that’s going on in my world and mind. That would be frightening for all of us.
 
So again, just for example and no need to judge (I got that covered). 

What I’ve noticed by making these lists over the years is that the things on the left often counter the missteps on the right. So if I focus on what’s working—those positive behaviors—that often helps take care of my not-best behaviors.
 
My lists help me recognize my not-helping patterns and think of ways to interrupt them. Like maybe with a game! That’s how I came up with a dice game when I kept skipping my morning workouts.

What I like about this exercise:

• It’s an easy and thoughtful way to reflect on my daily habits.
• It reminds me of the positives, not just the negatives.
• It highlights patterns for me to examine.
• It inspires me to think of solutions and interventions. 

I am a believer
I use the chore games on this blog in my daily life. These simple hacks add to my happiness and help me feel better about myself. Gaming beats shaming or blaming, friends.

Most recently, I have: 

• Rocked my chores. 
• Rolled with it. 
• Marked two items off my 19 for 2019 List: Hike on the Pacific Crest Trail and dine at the bar at a lovely local restaurant (The burger was delish!). 
• Relied on the morning version of the 10-pick-up game. 
• Listened to the RYC playlist while doing chores and getting ready for work. 
• Played Company is coming!
• Forced my hand in numerous ways.
• Started The Car Clutter Challenge.

 
I was also an accountability partner for my sister. She made a chores list and then texted me to pick a number. I was her rocks. She got stuff done and I loved it!